You’re such a bitch. My insomnia may differ from the typical case. I do get sleep, just not enough of it. Most nights I’m running on about five hours, and even that isn’t uninterrupted rest. I’m so damn tired. I’ve tried everything, but I’ve learned not to force sleep — meaning don’t try to sleep if you’re not actually sleepy. Just ride it out and wait for it to come. Often, if you must be up for work or school and you’re watching the clock, you start stressing because you know you won’t sleep and you have to be up soon. I’ve learned not to keep clocks in my room for that reason.

This isn’t new to me. I’ve always had sleeping issues even as a kid, a pattern that’s stuck with me into adulthood. I’m more productive at night, and as much as I complain about it I do enjoy listening to the distant traffic and the few determined people making the early commute to work.

I don’t mind a little insomnia in my life, provided I have nothing planned for the following day. As long as I manage to grab some decent sleep at some stage during the night, that’s better than nothing. I’m in the lucky position of not having anything I must get up for. Tonight — or this morning, I should say — it’s 6:32am and I haven’t had a moment’s rest. I don’t help myself by spending ninety-nine percent of my time in bed, on the laptop or watching Netflix during the day. I’ve had plenty of doctors tell me the bedroom should be for sleeping only. Well, I thoroughly smash that rule!

I’ve tried different medications: Imovain, Stilnox, temazepam, chloral hydrate, Valium, and my current medication, nitrazepam, which is the one prescribed when other options have failed. It’s a last‑resort sleeping pill, but the problem is I sometimes take them during the day when I’ve run out of diazepam (Valium), I need a higher dose.