Creativity has destroyed me, masculinity fails to sooth me, Can’t get you out of my mind, you inspire me. It comes in the form of a tree, we share the same consciousness, so share some of my loneliness. Throw your money in the fountain, never been to the top of this mountain. Overwhelmingly mine, it shows I’ve got some spine. You bring me some wine, not worthy of putting it all on the line. I’ve come this far without a drink, my shrink watches me sink, in dark waters, the bottom unseen. My body is clean, please let me lean, on your pride and salvation, I put myself through this starvation. I’m reminded to take my medication, my doctor prescribes, no trepidation. don’t stress it’s just a conversation. My minor shakes have turned to convulsions, taking my steady hand is no longer. This comes with my other health problems, by myself I ponder? Can this relationship come with a manuscript, I’m confused and amused, my delusion's are no joke, almost make me choke. seamlessly broke, nothing left to smoke. I have kidney disease, I deal with this with ease. After all this was all brought on by quick-eze. My mind wonders in the breeze of mortality. Here’s a thought; Christianity or a self induced calamity. These pills have got on top of me. Left the hospital with eleven meds, to stop the paranoia and voices, damn they insist on what to swallow, what colourful pills, leave me with enticing medical bills. Learning some new skills, together we will walk the hills. All looks different from this height, never too late to ponder the night. Debilitating pain, it’s all formed in my brain. I sometimes think I’m slightly insane. Too old to play this game. Since this, nothing has been the same. What a shame! It burns a hole straight through the soul, removing reluctancy to reignite this smoldering coal. Another random act of kindness, oh lord, cure my blindness. I want clarity to see my discrepancies, tear down this wall of forgotten ancestries. The nonsense that goes through my head, so easily led and coloured in red. Midnight has just ticked over and we celebrate another day, let’s all prey for another way. My feelings are put at bay, No need for another x-ray. I’m in a constant fear of not getting my way. Holding hands, the ones that tremor, to appreciate the bond between us. No room for lust, this vape is a must. Saving coin eases the mind, I’m not rare enough to be one of a kind. It’s left me in a bind. Opposites attract, The masses react. Together we can topple this system. Put me on a mission. A deadly collision between hallucinations and reality. I’m burdened by naivety. Please come sit with me, I don’t bite but I have a tendency to latch on to people from whom I can demand a chaotic aftermath of the inevitable. I’m so unstable, I don’t even come with a label. Just trust me and put it all on the table. We need to move on. My ego has taken a beating. Such a cold night, no heating. Bills need paying, I’m just saying. This glue keeps us together, a lost feather, I’m really not that clever, this relationship we have to sever. Intoxicants aren’t for me, for a while it made me free but now I am left empty and angry. In desperate need of sleep. Writing words becomes tedious but I know no other way to alert you and say.. wake up! Please throw a coin in my cup, every penny counts, every person can recount the obligation of empathy. no matter how hollow and empty is my selfishness. Be kind to your fellow man. I wanna make it to the gates but I’m not sure if my scorecard will cause debate. I’m sorry God for rocking up so late. Am I still your mate? Society begs me to let go of my pride and strive, I survive off a pension, does this deserve a mention? So far no cravings from the evil, toxic, poison I was once in a friendship with. Nothing at all! I hate you so much, don’t bother to keep in touch. The connection has been broken, no free tokens.