I am an addict. The vape has me under its spell, dominating my thoughts and habits more than I ever expected. This game is becoming ridiculous and exhausting. I have quit time and time again, only to slip back repeatedly and feel the weight of failure each time. The cigarettes and alcohol were much easier to eliminate from my life, but I remain a slave to the vape and its relentless pull. I hate the feeling of being helpless to its grip, of something taking over me that I can’t control no matter how hard I try. Physically I feel fine — certainly not as awful as when I was smoking cigarettes — and I’ve saved money since vapes are considerably easier on my bank account. I keep telling myself that I’m doing no harm, but deep down I know I’m kidding myself. When I saw the doctor a few days back she told me not to be too hard on myself and that we could work on reducing my vaping a bit later. I’m not using that as an excuse to continue the way I have been, but her lack of alarm surprised me and left me unsure. The real question is: how do I quit for good? It sounds so simple to say “just stop,” but it’s far more complicated than that. When I was in hospital a little while back I went nine days without touching one, yet the cravings didn’t ease, especially after I went home. In the end, I gave in. You disappoint me Dave!